It’s weird, especially in modern world, how many there are people that have been given, as a life guide sentence: Smile when it is hardest; nobody loves weak; don’t let them see you are not ok; you must be strong in life… Since we are born, we learn the game of power: I am stronger, I am braver; It’s nothing; You can’t hurt me; Nothing can stop me, make me mad, my emotions are always under my control. Although those attributes are adjusted to man, women are also proud of them, because they are not focused on physical strength but rather on structure of the personality and character.
How big had to be kingdom of fear, when the starting point was defined as – people are evil and the world is dangerous place to live in? Where else would come thought, belief that the strength is good, and weakness is not; that happiness can be shown, but not sadness; that we have to be strong because only the strong ones can succeed? And what brings together humans is mostly their vulnerability and mortality.
Everyman is vulnerable, even maybe on different ways, sensitive to different situations and events. What is important to highlight is that everyone has his weak point, his Achilles heel, and some of us have couple of them. How sensitive are we going to be depends on multiple factors: emotional sensitiveness of the man is partly transferred with genetics, partly formed from the early childhood, and partly is acquired through different painful life situations.
Under the term of vulnerability, we consider entire palate of feelings: insecurity and unrest, over melancholy and sadness, to doubt and different fears. We spend big part of our life trying to hide these feelings, we mask them fighting their existence without asking ourselves are those feelings useful to us, is it necessary to understand them and accept them as a part of ourselves and use them somehow.
Of course, it doesn’t mean that we should swim in our tears and torture ourselves with sadness without any effort to help ourselves, but we must ask ourselves what are we sad about and what can we do to banish the sadness. Only then, accepting and with constructive approach to problem solution, we can really understand sadness (or any other negative feeling) and accept it with happiness, because thanks to it we might become better person that gives love! Thanks to it, we learned a valuable lesson, and from our enemy SADNESS, we made a FRIEND!
Only when we admit our vulnerability to ourselves, accept it and share with others, we have created opportunity for development of empathy for introducing Love.
Instead of making huge effort to hide our vulnerability, instead of sweeting under heavy mask and theatrical costume we choose for ourselves, we daily get an opportunity to make ourselves happy by making others happy, and this is how: when we feel discomfort, fear, sadness, it is important to withstand current discomfort, stop assumptions and tell to another person how we really feel about certain situation. What will probably happen is – look full of gratitude for confidence, instantaneous closeness followed by a tear in the eye, compassion, and the sentence: “Yes, it often happens to me too”, or “I feel the same”, or any other sentence that reflects unity and recognition. Of course, I can’t guarantee that this reaction will be from EVERYONE, but give them time to adapt and relax… Maybe they have chosen a medieval armor as their costume, and it is harder to reject it. I am confident that most of your surrounding does not consist of unsensitive people from whom reactions we should run away.
It’s not just stranger from whom we hide our vulnerability, imperfection and humanity. In great extent, we do same with our close ones, partners, children, parents, friends. Any kind of nearness is absent, so dissatisfaction and sadness are what is beneath perfect smiled face and seemingly harmonious relations. This hurts everyone close to us, and they show their dissatisfaction on multiple ways, without us knowing about it. It is because we all are connected with invisible strings that enable us to exchange the subtlest information regarding the state of our soul.
On conscious level, people are not able to explain our feelings, they often can’t explain their own, but subconsciously they feel whether something is wrong with them or not. But, if they love us, they are ready to believe us.
Here is an example that illustrates why showing vulnerabilities is functional and how it has a certain power.
Imagine a street dog that is walking towards you. Whether you love dogs or not, this four-leg example is big, seems strong and has no owner. It is possible that you already think about what will you do, but he is ahead of you and throws you down to your back, tail wagging. His tail reminds you of your grandma’s scarf. His paws are up high, tongue is out through half-open jaws, now he looks like smiling. He’s calling you to cuddle, he is all yours. You might do it, or not. Itis possible that you love dogs, but you don’t want your hands and clothes to get dirty. But it is evident that you will feel kindness and situation might bring smile on your face.
Imagine now, same dog approaching you with his tail bent down, clenched teeth, growling louder. He wants to demonstrate you how strong he is, to convince you that it is better for you to stay away from him. But it evokes fear in you, and you start looking for a stone (you will probably not use it, but it is better to have one). However, you will feel discomfort and fear. Dog will smell your adrenalin and act instinctively, knowing that when a man releases adrenalin it leads to no good, and the dog will be growling even louder.It does not matter who is going to scare who, and will it lead to attack or not, the important thing is that the bad emotion is initiated and that demonstration of power and force has caused more negative flow than the one that caused vulnerability. Have you ever tried to surrender as a puppy on his back?
Prayer meditations that will help you on your release of vulnerability path:
- I pray to God (Creator, Universe, Absolute…) to eliminate fear from showing vulnerabilities
- I pray to God (Creator, Universe, Absolute…) to constitute in me the energy of the Universe (God’s energy)
- I pray to God (Creator, Universe, Absolute…) for my intuition to mature
- I pray to God (Creator, Universe, Absolute…) to aware the universal Love in me.
- I love and accept myself the way I really am.
- My inner wisdom guides me everywhere.
- I am a creator of my life and my relations.
- Now I create my life and relations the way I want them to be.
You might open your heart right now and tell your loved ones how you feel, because who knows, you might be pleasantly surprised! I am sure that the energy you use for choosing the perfect mask, can be used for joy, happiness and laughter! Then, you will have better time in your already beautiful life!
Your Academy <3