“If you ever have to choose one characteristic someone should have, what would it be?”, someone recently asked me.
After I had to give just one answer, I said: “If I had to choose just one characteristic a person must have, then it would be talking full and complete responsibility for its life.”
Yes, there are many different characteristics and habits that have to be developed in order for you to become extraordinary, but there is no better starting point from taking full responsibility for our lives.
We live in a world where maximum results are expected with minimal effort. If something goes wrong, someone else is guilty for it. If you are not satisfied with your financial situation, then the “government” is guilty. If you are not satisfied with your marriage, it is your partner’s fault. If you are not payed as much as you think you deserve, bad company owner exploits his workers and does not pay enough.
Does it sound familiar? It is in human nature to blame circumstances or others instead of taking responsibility. But, in order to live your extraordinary life, you have to stop thinking like this, RIGHT AWAY.
Therefore, how can we, once and for all, take full responsibility for our lives? Here are three ways that will help you start.
Make a decision
Everything starts with firm decision. Sounds simple, but there is a very small percentage of people that can really make a decision to take full responsibility for their lives. In most cases, people keep coming back to their old habits and forget that they are actually sitting behind the wheel of their lives and that they choose the direction. Just them, no one else!
Force yourself to stop searching for reasons outside of yourself, for the things that are not under your control. It is a simple concept, but it is not easy to be consistent with it and to be honest with ourselves admitting that the situation depends on us. From now on, make a firm decision that no event or person will dictate you what to do and how to do it.
Stop playing game of ACCUSATIONS
Many people fight this “vice”, including me (from time to time). As I already mentioned, it is easier to accuse your partner when your relationship becomes unstable. It is easy to blame government for not having job or being financially unsuccessful.
It is absolutely necessary to throw away every excuse and completely take responsibility in all areas of your life. Results or reasons. There is nothing else… Get a result, do not search for find a reason you have failed.
What I find useful is to write simple goals in notebook, and by doing this I fully take responsibility for my life. It is something I do for years. I will not elaborate here how to define goals (it is a matter of individual coaching sessions that I preform with my clients), but long story short – goals must be very specific, measurable and have time limitations. It can be something simple like: “I, (Name), will by 31.12.2015 lose 30 kg; in average 5kg per month; by reducing my calories and with regular workouts that include walks and gym for at least 60 min every two days. I give promise to myself that I will never forget that I have taken full responsibility for gaining and maintaining my ideal weight.”
There are many people that have taken full responsibility for every aspect of their lives.
Are you ready to do it?